… it’s a very good place to start!
Getting pregnant (as it turned out) was not something I had problems with. Staying pregnant was a bit harder than anticipated.
About 5- 6 weeks into my first pregnancy I was stopped in my ‘rush hour’ tracks by the most breath taking pain in my side. A few days later I was being told that I had what was termed a ‘suspected’ ectopic. ‘Suspected’ because it was very early on (5-6 weeks) and hard to determine. The intact empty sac, pain and nasty bleed all pointed in that direction. I managed to hold myself together until the point when the consultant mentioned that he wanted to go inside and cut some of my baby making bits! I was just about getting my head around losing my first baby let alone finding out they wanted to disable half of those facilities!
I smile sometimes when my girls ask ‘Why?’. The first thing I said to the consultant was, ‘Why? Is there nothing else you can do?’ Having never had an operation of any sort I was keen to keep it that way! Eventually we came to a compromise. I was allowed to have a chemo jab instead which would purge my body of anything nasty and in the wrong place on the understanding that if it happened again they would have no option but to have a look inside! To say my world turned upside down is an understatement . It was a very bleak time in my life.
With my 2nd pregnancy I was scanned as soon as I found out I was pregnant just in case it was another ectopic. It was looking good. A tiny little beat inside the sac.
After a few weeks of regular checks the early pregnancy unit sent me on my way with a thumbs up. And at 13 weeks we trotted off with nervous excitement to get our 3 month scan. To be honest I can’t remember what the lady doing the scan said or how I reacted … It was not good news!
My baby had died a couple of weeks before and my body had kept it … I’d had a missed miscarriage! It was an awful time. I still felt and looked pregnant and yet I wasn’t!
As an IT contractor I was working long hours and travelling lots so by my 3rd pregnancy I had decided with Dad-to-Be to give up work.
My 3rd pregnancy was hard for both of us. I was worried about the baby and Dad-to-Be was worried about me and the baby. We managed to get through all the early pregnancy unit checks and made it past the 12 week and 20 week scan but we still found it hard to relax. Too frightened of tempting fate. I don’t think we looked at, let alone bought any baby things, until I was 6 months pregnant and we left decorating the nursery until I was 8 months pregnant.
The pregnancy itself was great (if you discount a 6 week continual migraine that ended up with me in A&E). I bought a doppler so I could listen to the heart beat of my ever growing bundle. I had no complications,a nice neat bump and embraced every minute of being pregnant. We just couldn’t relax until my baby was out and breathing in life.
When she arrived it was a truly amazing moment and one that I will remember for the rest of my life.
My 4th pregnancy took us by suprise. Don’t get me wrong it was planned and as usual took one attempt (something my OH likes to remind me about!). My eldest was a gift of a baby. Calm, gentle, dare I say … easy. So when she was 5 months old we decided to go for another.
I remember to this day having my scan at 6 weeks to check that everything was ok. The consultant was doing the scanning. She turned to her registrar and told her to go and get Sister Wendy as there was something she should see. Dad-to-Be squeezed my hand as I looked at him anxiously. Bloody hell, something was wrong again!
Sister Wendy was training to be a sonograher herself so she could have complete control over the early pregnancy unit and keep it in house. I knew her well as she’s been there through all of my pregnancies. As she walked into the room she glanced at the screen …
‘Oh My God, It’s Twins!’ she blurted out!
And the rest as they say is history …
reading this just reminded me that I bought a doppler too….I was obsessed with it! I had 2 straightforward pregnancies and then after a gap of 4.5 years had 2 missed miscarriages within 4 months of each other, I don’t think anyone can understand how hard it is to go through unless you have been through it, it still upsets me now to think back to that time……but I have my tiny tearaway now which makes it easier!
Sorry, just seen your post Helen. The doppler was a massive comforter to me. Being able to listen to my girls heartbeats was wonderful. I’ve still got mine and we sometimes pull it out and have a listen to all our hearts. xxx
Our news on getting twins was very similar. We went for a scan after a bleed, expecting the worst (previous miscarriage too) and were asked “Do you have twins in the family? You do now!” We went from one extreme to the other.
Rob